(Oh gawd. Behind on the journal stuff again. XD But I am having fun answering asks an such. So it’s okay! 😀 I really should try to go back to writing one of these a week. Maybe after the holidays when life calms back down. XD Cause things are just so hectic right now. Nothing in this is really in a chronological order. XD On the plus side… Day 5 completed… 3 days remain. @cheetah-smith-ffxiv @jonahsage @kindlingdusk @chocobohealer @onidephor for mentions.)

I seem to be neglecting to write in here as often as I used to. I guess life has been a bit busier then normal. Especially now with my cousin in the picture.

Lance and I have been spending time when we both can getting to know each other. It has been mostly casual. He hasn’t tried to pry for anything more then I am willing to speak with him on. Then again part of me is still waiting for him to stab me in the back. I don’t think he will though… I guess it is still part of me not ready to accept that someone from that side of the family actually cares.

He did mention the other night he had come looking for me to tend to some injuries he had gotten while on duty. I guess he got injured fending off an attack in a joint effort with some of the Fortemps troops from Dragonhead. Some aevis scored a lucky hit on him. Apparently Tara took care of it for him though.

He also mentioned some sparring match that happened while he was visiting. Something about Aras and Dusk. He didn’t have all the details as he and Tara had arrived towards the end of the match. Though he made mention of interest in challenging her himself sometime. As well as that he met Nate after. Who didn’t seem to be having a good day.

Speaking on Nate. I’m glad he has so much patience for me some days. I feel I have been rather snappish with him lately. I guess I am just still upset from last week’s mission. I don’t really mean to take it out on him. I mean we have moments where I feel like we might clash an I get so scared of what might happen if we do. I guess I should have a bit more faith. Faith that the bond between us is stronger then a few ill words.

I mean he did get a chance to see me use a bow for a change in the Twelveswood last week. Tara had gotten lost. Or rather something had spooked her chocobo. It was nice… Fighting side by side like that. Instead of just watching his back. We did manage to find Tara safe and sound though she had been chased by a few tempered Sylphs. Nate and I had gone to check an make sure they had all returned to their territory after they gave up the chase. Of course we found some stragglers. That was how Nate and I got to fight side by side. I was unlucky that day apparently though. One of the sylphs managed to catch me off guard an I was zapped pretty good. No real physical injury though besides feeling rather numb and tingly. Nate got us back to the house before actually carrying me inside on his back. I was a bit… embarrassed honestly. Mostly because there were others in the house at the time. But at the same time I was afraid I might trip an fall on my face with the way certain parts of my body felt numb. I knew it would wear off in time though. So it wasn’t like I hadn’t agreed to let him carry me.

Dusk pulled me aside once I was feeling a bit less numb. We stepped aside into my room to talk privately. Apparently she felt the need to caution me about Leera and Rose. She doesn’t want Leera anywhere near Rose. Our youngest an newest member. I understand she is young an still learning. However I was a bit offended that she felt the need to try an caution me yet again. I know Leera -can- be dangerous. I’ve always held a measure of caution when dealing with Leera ever since learning the truth about who an what he is. There is always a certain amount of caution needed when dealing with a predator. I want to believe Leera can be good, can do something more then be a tool for his creators. Even Oni when we had a discussion earlier in the day had believed there might be a chance for Leera to be a better person. He just needs to be taken away from the bad influences an given a chance. So I told Dusk my own opinions an what Oni had said. It was admitting Leera does need to change. Yet I still feel Leera does care about me in a way.

I had told Oni about the potion Leera had given to me. About how Felix thought it had been something to be used against him. That was how our discussion went from Oni’s new tools into talk of his sibling. I haven’t seen Leera for a bit of time now. He had told me I wouldn’t.  But in our talk Oni did agree Leera wasn’t always the way he is now. That maybe if he was taken away from ‘father’ that there could be a chance for real change. I mean it is worth a shot if I can find a way. Why else would Leera care enough to keep speaking to me or even give me a potion for my own safety? I am certainly not -that- entertaining for him to be toying with me.

Oh! On a rather positive note. I survived my first cooking lesson with J’siris. I had offered him use of my new kitchen an he proceeded to teach me a stew. It actually turned out really well even with me helping make it. I didn’t even cut any fingers this time! I even took some to Lance before I joined the Order at the house for the evening.

Anyways I better finish my work before the mission this evening. It is nearly time.