Alex hadn’t mentioned to Sanagi that he planned to go to Coerthas today. The idea could potentially be dangerous but he was hoping not. She could have insisted on going with him. This was something he needed to do alone though.
Sitting down on the bit of crumbled stone wall near the gates to Ishgard as he waited. Being this close alone was dangerous. Dangers of being arrested or even killed. The painful reminders of what this place was to him. A frozen prison. The problem was this was the best place to encounter the man he was looking for. Lighting a cigarette as he waited.
Lance had returned to Ishgard to deliver something to his little brother. Not that he was able to deliver it in person sadly. Things were not fixed that easily. If ever. His mother and sister still refused to even acknowledge him after everything that had happened. Only his little brother still believed in him and cared.
Tara had given him back that one small piece of his family. Looking down at the linkpearl in his palm as snow drifted down softly around him. His brother and Tara had met. Tara had managed to get them both linkpearls so they could be in contact with one another. It was better then nothing. It was better then never knowing. For that he owed Tara so much. She was always looking out for him. Even letting him stay with her at her apartment while Miu was away.
Gods above it was lonely without Miu at his apartment. Silently, he offered a prayer to Halone to watch out for his beloved.
Alex looked up from his half smoked cigarette. There was that familiar dark haired elezen he was waiting for. Clearly not even paying attention either. The man was looking down at something in his hands with a sad smile on his face. It made Alex hesitate. No longer sure he wanted to do this or could.
It was hard trying to be a better person. To let go of the anger and pain. Yet he kept trying in his own broken, messed up way. Even when the odds were his former friend would never forgive him.
Lance finally looked up from the linkpearl as he tucked it away for safe keeping. The moment his eyes fell on someone waiting for him… That slightly sad expression was quickly gone and in it’s place was a hard cold one.
“Alexois…” It came out as a low growl.
“Lancefer.” Alex said as he pushed off the wall and flicked away the end of his smoke. “Long time no see. Been a few moons.”
“Not long enough.” Lance kept his hand away from the sword at his hip. Remembering Miu’s words and asking him to try to understand. But all he could remember was the wicked look on Alex’s face as he killed Lance’s fellow knights in cold blood. It was harder to let go with the whispering that stone kept doing to him.
Alex took a flask out of his coat pocket as he held it up to show it wasn’t a weapon. Picking a spot to lean instead of sitting. It would be safer if he needed to dodge or move fast. He could see the way Lance tensed at his presence. He hoped the fact that Lance hadn’t attacked him right away meant something other then death.
“I know…” Alex shrugged as he took a drink. Looking at the flask and then Lance. Finally holding it out towards the other man. “I ain’t here to fight. I just… Wanted to tell you… My side of things. If you don’t want to listen then fine. I get it. What I did was shit. Worse then shit. I didn’t know how else to handle it.”
Lance gave him a hard stare for several long moments of silence before finally moving towards him. Remembering the angry young man he’d found sitting alone in the cold giving everyone death glares. Taking the offered flask before leaning against the wall a couple feet away from Alex. “Fine. Then talk before I change my mind.”
Alex actually seemed surprised. Almost like he hadn’t expected Lance to agree. Nodding his head before looking up at the snowy clouds above. “Alley cat tell you anything about what happened?”
“Some. An it’s Miu not Alley Cat.”
Alex shrugs. “We didn’t know each others names back then. We just helped each other survive. Some days I think I would have been better off dead. But I wasn’t interested in dying then either.” Taking another drink from the flask as Lance passed it back to him.
“Get to the point, Alexois.”
A heavy sigh as Alex shakes his head. “I never meant to be your friend. It happened. I’d never really had someone not care about where I came from. Or who I was. Well I mean yeah no one gave a shit who I was anyways. But…”
“You meant no one cared who you were and still wanted to be your friend. Friends don’t betray friends like you did, Alexois.” Lance gave him a very dry look as he took the flask back again when it was handed over.
“Yeah. That shit. Two stupid ass broken kids from opposite sides of Ishgard’s fucked up society. What a fucked up pair we were. You had everything I wanted and it still never truly made you happy.” Alex chuckles with one of his usual smirks.
“Hard to be happy in a home where you have to fake a smile. Or where no one cared about the nightmares left behind from the attack on the Vigil. You know that. Somehow… We just understood each other back then.” Lance looked over at the flask in Alex’s hands for several long moments. Remembering the nights they were drunk off their asses and getting into fights with other people. “We stopped understanding each other the night you killed those men in front of me. They were good people, Alexois. They had lives and families.”
“I know.” Alex sighs as he rubs a hand over his face. “I know… But Jacques wanted your life. To me that was more important cause you gave a shit about me. Even if it meant I had to make you hate me. Lot of good it did me though. Bastard still wanted you dead in the end. I was back to being alone in the world.”
“What about what you did to my cousin? The part you played in the destruction of my family?” There was anger coloring Lance’s voice as Alex passed the flask back again.
“Your dumbass father set that up. They baited me with the name of my worthless father. The gil was good too but what I wanted most was that name. It was never meant to be something personal. It was just business. For what it’s worth… Even if it ends up meaning nothing to you… I’m sorry, Lance.” Alex pushed off the wall and waved a hand when Lance tried to offer the flask back. “I have a place in the Mists. I’m tired of running. When you decide whether you want to kill me or arrest me… Come fine me.”
Now it was Lance’s turn to look surprised. The anger seemed to drain away as he looked at Alex’s back. Then down to his hands as he remembered that day in the cave where Alex had set them up. The scar he gave Alex on the face when he retaliated over what had been done. “Alex.”
Alex stopped, almost afraid to turn around and look. It had been a very long time since Lance had used the shortened version of his name. “Yeah?”
“For what it’s worth…” Lance looked back up towards Alex. “I’d rather not kill you. But it is still my duty to arrest criminals. We’re still in Ishgard territory. Go. Before I have to do something I will regret for the rest of my life. For old times sake…”
“Heh. Yeah… For old times sake. See you around. Maybe.” Alex actually smiled slightly. Even if Lance couldn’t see that smile. Giving Lance a half wave as he started walking. Clearly their friendship wasn’t meant to be mended. Not easily anyways. But it was a start. Definitely a start. It would never be what it used to be. That day in the cave would forever mark what they had once had. Yet to know Lance didn’t fully hate and despise him… He’d take it. Words couldn’t fix the things he’d done. At least they could hopefully make Lance understand a little better why he’d done them.
Lance finally pushed off the wall once Alex was out of sight. Tucking the flask away in his own coat. Something was definitely different about this Alexois. Almost like the man was finally starting to mature past the cocky brat who hated the world. Yet not everything had changed either. It was a start though. Even if it was a late start. “Miu… You were right. Maybe there is hope for Alex yet.” Looking up at the snowflakes drifting down lazily.
Spirit of the Warlock 